我想要一些英語(yǔ)幽默的小故事。（簡(jiǎn)單點(diǎn)）

A teacher said to her class:

"Who was the first man?"

“George Washington," a little boy shouted promptly.

"How do you make out that George Washington was the first man?" asked the teacher, smiling indulgently.

"Because, " said the little boy, "he was first in war, first in peace, and first in the hearts of his countrymen."

But at this point a larger boy held up his hand.

"Well," said the teacher to him, "who do you think was the first man?"

"I don't know what his name was," said the larger boy, "but I know it wasn't George Washington, ma'am, because the history book says George Washington married a widow, so, of course, there must have been a man ahead of him_"

中式英語(yǔ)：

昨天來(lái)了個(gè)老外，進(jìn)到辦公室，前臺(tái)小姐左看右看，大家都在打游戲，只有自己比較清閑，就 面帶微笑的：
前臺(tái)小姐：“hello?”
老外：“hi.”
前臺(tái)小姐：“you have what thing?”
老外：“can you speak English? ”
前臺(tái)小姐：“if I not speak English, I am speaking what?”　
老外：“can anybody else speak English? ”
前臺(tái)小姐：“you yourself look. all people are playing, no people
have time, you can wait, you wait, you not wait, you go.”
老外：“good heavens. anybody here can speak English?”
前臺(tái)小姐：“ shout what shout, quiet a little, you on earth have what thing.”
老外：“I want to speak to your head.”
前臺(tái)小姐：“head not zai.you tomorrow come.”